Thursday, May 29, 2014

Life

Going through change is hard.
I have been really been thinking (like Sims here)
about life and the type of mama I want to truly be.
(no,it's not too late for that!)

We've been trying to adjust to life changes, business changes,
school ending, planning a winter getaway,
planning a move to another state, (Texas)
and just the busy times of having a family with 6 children
all with different personalities, wants and needs.



It's been 4 weeks now since my sweet 4 year old was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes.
 I can tell you it turned my life upside down 
for what seemed like forever
When in actuality it was only a week or so

Aren't struggles like that?
Once I accepted it,
accepted that our (her) life would be different than 
I was used to
things were fine.
Once I accepted it,
I was no longer mad at God.

Yes, I said that, didn't I?
I was mad at God.
I was.
I was hurt and sad
(counting carbs for a 4 year old is tricky, one trick I do to help
is fancy divider plates, makes counting easier and eating fun)
 
 I felt like, 
"How could YOU do this to ME?"
I do so much for YOU

Don't we all feel like that?
What we are doing is "enough"
Or better yet, more than enough?
but is it?
Sometimes God knows we need more.
We should never become lukewarm, 
or OK with the mediocre



 I started thinking, 
"I've been through so much, 
I've been a good girl, now let me coast a while"
(reward me)

I still struggle with this, 
I  kind of fear God and what He will give us next.

God has a sense of humor.
He is also gentle.
He knows all and He sees all.
He sees the BIG picture.

And I TRUST.
I do not know who said this, 
but it goes something like this:

"If you don't have a cross in life,
you better get on your knees and beg for one"

I believe it.
I know it.
It is through our crosses that we grow closer to God
A friend recently asked for prayers 
and she asked if I'd offer up some of my suffering for her.
I was like, 
"I'm not suffering, but I'll pray for you"

Really, I heal that quickly.
I'm such a baby
when it starts though.

I cry
I beg for Him to take it away
and
instead of saying 
"Why me?"
or  even
"Why not me?"
I get jealous, point fingers and say things like, 
"Why not them?"

We are like little children
At least I am.
I complain and cry and finally

I accept things the way they are.
The way God has allowed.
And you know what?
  

 A BIG weight is lifted off my shoulders.

Are things a little harder than they were before?
Yes.
Are we all OK?
Yes.
Will we survive?
Yes.
Things are normal now
(besides mealtimes being a little more chaotic than they were before)
(Yes, I guess that is possible)
Summer will be tricky with bringing her supplies and snacks,
but we'll figure it out.
 God is continually working on me.
Giving me more patience
(towards crabby, demanding kiddos)
more charity
 (towards people that ask dumb questions--my pet peeve)


And after acceptance is set in, 
I realize there was nothing to cry about in the first place.
There is a lot more suffering out there.
This is small.

Once hard things are accepted,
they are no longer hard.
The cross is lifted.

But if we complain about and compare our "hard things"
with others, our crosses will remain and we will be burdened.


“Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart; and you will find rest for your selves. For my yoke is easy, and my burden light.”
Matthew Chapter 11:28-30





I have not been reading blogs much, I'm so sorry, forgive me?

Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Piano Recital!



I hope I'm not boring you with these
 but this is kind of a scrapbook of sorts for me!
I'm going to show you these from oldest to youngest
The oldest 2 have had 7 years of piano
and the younger ones have had 1 year.
Their beautiful teacher Mary, is very special to us, 
spreading her joy and music to our home!

video
It's not the very beginning because I had to snap a picture first, 
then switch it to "record".




I never tire of hearing them play.
It's one of my favorite things in the whole world


She decided she was done after one year, 
and said that is why she was so calm and relaxed 
for this performance, she was thinking,
"I never have to play again"
(yes, I'm sad about that)

She loves to play and plans on at least 7 years!

Thursday, May 22, 2014

Slow Down

This video is graphic (that's your warning)

It brings up many thoughts and feelings.
Are our souls ready?
A split second and our world can completely change.
and 
SLOW DOWN!!!


Wednesday, May 21, 2014

First Holy Communion!

 It was a beautiful day!! 
(she is holding her beautiful rosary made by Barbara)
She loves it!
Can I just say that not all girls like their pictures taken?
And
 not all girls care what their hair looks like on their First Holy Communion day?
(thank you)

My first daughter was like, 
"Oh, please take 236 more photos of me"
(OK, not really, but close)

My second daughter was somewhere in the middle...
this one, not so much.
 She also got a hand embroidered scapular made by Barbara
(thank you Barbara, she loves it!)

Oh, my these clay rosaries are such a treasure!!


 My sweet little 7 year old is a no fuss kind of girl
She just had her big sister paint her nails her favorite color
 and wanted her hair cut short for the big day!
My cousin Kristin is our lovely stylist!!
 Cute as a bug!

 We made a few dozen cookies for the big day....

 The girls helped frost them all!


 And we were ready to go!
(OK, after cleaning, or trying to clean with 6 kiddos,
 and grocery shopping and preparing food)
 She got to do the first reading, 
(which was a really hard reading, did you see those names last Sunday?)
 petitions and help carry up the gifts
She did a super job!
Big brother got to serve that day too!
Gotta love 7 year olds!!
(click on the picture for a close up!)
 Mesmerized by the candles...
 After Mass, we did pictures with godparents....

 and our own family
 At which point, she was DONE.


Please honey, just one more....you can get out of the dress as soon as I'm done!


OK, 2 more....I need one black and white...
Out of the dress, life is better now...
Father Tom here, came to visit for a little bit
She told him he had to stand by Mary because he's a priest.
We had a house full!
But who's counting?
OK, Tom was counting, we had 28 guests!
It was such a fun day!

My aunt and uncle came, and that is their granddaughter Ava in the corner
I wanted pictures of my grandma, my in-laws...and many other people that came to visit, 
but dang it, I just didn't get pictures of everyone!  
***note to self***
MUST HAVE ONE OF THE BIG KIDS TAKE PICTURES OF EVERYONE NEXT TIME!!!
 We got a cake picture, but you can't even see the writing...
Oh, well...this is my good friend Nicki and her beautiful daughter Melissa!

 My beautiful cousin Kristin...

 My beautiful friend Sarah! (all the way from Fargo!)
Look at those blue eyes!!!

 Our kiddos all had a blast together til they had to go...
A day filled with blessings!

Saturday, May 17, 2014

Labor Day (A Movie Review!)

 Tom and I watched this last night, 
and I could swear that someone told me it had a terrible ending.
It does NOT.
It is definitely sad towards the end, 
but the ending is far from terrible!
 I hope I didn't give anything away by mentioning that.
Josh Brolin plays an escaped convict that enlists the help of Kate Winslet's character
and her son.
What happens in that short Labor Day weekend, 
ends up shaping their lives forever.
If you see the movie, 
the pie scene is memorable and I found this interesting,
the actors went to a small town in Massachusetts to learn how to make pie!
Ha!  Isn't that a neat tidbit?

I give it a thumbs up!!
You will cry towards the end.
And then, you will be happy.
Promise.

Although, nothing happens in this movie, I don't even think there are any swear words, 
there is adult content in it and so I'd give it a mature teen rating.
(a girl the son befriends, says things like, "they are off having sex"
 and "they want to get rid of you so they can have sex." stuff like that)

Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Type 1 Diabetes

 I thought I'd clarify what this disease is.


 There is no cure, no miracle vitamin
 or pill that will help us to manage it better
or cure us.
There is no "natural" way to help us.
Type 1 diabetes is forever.
 Our immune system started viewing our pancreas cells as foreign
and attacked them.
Dead.
Our pancreas's will never work.
Ever. 

The reason is unknown, but we do know that there is 
no way to predict who will get it, or when.
There is no way to prevent it or delay it.
It just happens.

Completely different 


 "The pump" is only a device to help deliver insulin, it is not a cure.
It does not test our blood for us either.
We still need to count carbs
We still need to test our blood.

My 4 year old will not be on a pump til she is a teenager.


 I have to laugh, because I think I've heard all these stupid comments.
I'll try to answer some of these:

10.  There is no "Bad kind" of diabetes.  
It's all bad (haha)
9.  Candy did not cause this, or poor diet. 
                     Our immune system attacked our pancreas cells.

8.  If your grandma or aunt or anyone over 40 has diabetes, 
it is most likely type 2 diabetes, totally different disease.

Totally different.
But, maybe they are like my mom, and had Type 1 Diabetes since they were 24.
But probably not.
7.  We can eat sugar, we can eat anything we want.
Anything.
We just need to take insulin to match the carbs in whatever we eat.
So if I want to eat a whole chocolate cake, I can, 
but I'd need like a whole bottle of insulin
to combat that! Seriously, though, if I want cake, I can eat it, 
I 'd have a piece and take insulin to accommodate that.

6.  Hey, you are right. I feel so much better. Are you a moron?
5.  Well, then, let's pray you do not get Type 1 Diabetes, because
if you could NEVER give your needles, you'd be dead.
4.  Wow. I'm so sorry.
Poor control can cause poor circulation

3.  (well, I am now, but I've had 6 kiddos and am trying to lose it)
I was always thin before children.
OK, again, read the chart up top, 
Type 1 Diabetes is not caused by poor diet or from being overweight, by eating 
too much sugar or fat, that is Type 2. 

Totally different.

2.  Nothing can cure Type 1 Diabetes.
Nothing.

1.  Just what does a diabetic look like?


 The only thing that is harder for me is losing weight, 
I hope these 2 signs help explain that one for you.


OK, I won't hit anyone, but please don't ask a diabetic that question. 
They know what they can eat (anything)

Diabetes does not stop me from doing anything.
Diabetes will not stop my sweet 4 year old from doing anything either.
She can be in sports, she can do or become anything she wants.
She can get married and have babies (as many as God wants to give her)

Diabetes is not a burden.
I don't understand that one I guess.
It just is what it is.
Some things are harder.

That's life.
It's OK for some things to be harder.  

I don't even look at it as a cross.
It's second nature to do the things I do.
It will be that way for her too.
As soon as she understands what "Forever" really is.
(like this morning, she asked, again, "I'm bored of taking shots, when can I be done?")
(to which I respond, "Never sweetie, you will be taking shots forever")

Diabetes does not hold me back, it does not control me.
I control it.
She will too.


Friday, May 9, 2014

Movie Review!

AWESOME MOVIE!!

Laughed and cried through the whole thing!
Not one bad thing in it, I totally loved it!

We had 5 moms originally going, but a few cancelled 
so we were down to 2.

SO glad I went!

In Theaters now!

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