Saturday, June 20, 2009

Father's Day

This was a picture from last year on Father's Day, (at the Minnesota Zoo) but it's a great one and he's camping with Jedi so no new one yet!


I am blessed to have a wonderful husband and father to my children. He truly loves them each for their qualities. He spends time with them and is always there. A couple weeks ago, when our friend died, we heard that he had called all his kids the Friday before he died to tell them each his latest joke. His 9 children are all adults now. I thought this was amazing. I do not have that kind of relationship with my father. I can't imagine him calling to talk, let alone tell a joke. Ever. What would I say? My mom on the other hand, has always called, she used to call every day, but as I've said before the relationship is a little strained and hey, I just don't have the time anyway with 4 busy kiddos for every day conversations on the phone. SO, now it's maybe once a week that we talk on the phone.


Growing up, my parents had those typical male/female roles down perfect. The boys went with dad and the girls were (stuck) with mom. I know that sounds terrible, but, a typical Saturday would be us girls driving 40 minutes to the nearest mall to spend literally the whole day there. We'd get there around 11am and have lunch and then shop until we got home around 7:30 pm. Where my dad would yell at my mom about spending too much and getting home too late. To this day, I hate shopping. Always have. (My mom was doing what she thought "girls" like, afterall, she liked it)


One time, I remember my dad taking me with to re-roof a house. I worked so hard. I remember working way harder than my year younger brother. I had to impress dad so he'd think it was ok to take me along more often (like every Saturday). I remember trying to impress him with my lawn mowing abilities too. Never taking breaks, doing the best job I could. Always wanting his approval. My year younger brother took a ton of breaks and complained the whole time, unless there was a riding lawn mower, then he was the one to drive it, not me, the hard working one, because he was the "boy". Dad went to my brother's games because he was the "boy" and sports were more important than my Speech tournaments.


I think I've always tried to impress my dad with doing my best always. It never worked though, I never got that attention I craved. Which is probably why I went off and married such a jerk the first time (annulled everyone, don't have a heart attack, another post another time....maybe)


Now, I guess one good thing, since my parents joined the SSPX Church, (3 years ago) I no longer try to impress him. I don't crave his attention. At all. I also have a great (counselor) husband who helps me through all these feelings. Father's Day is kind of hard, all those personal cards, they just don't fit. I ended up getting a card with Darth Vader on it and the front says something like, "For years the age old question for all dads is, Why?" and inside (it's a talking card), Darth Vader's voice comes on and says "I am your Father" along with the deep breathing too!! It's funny and it works. (I also got one for Tom and my FIL)


Now, looking back on this post, I probably said too much, but it's the way it is. Not all my relationships are perfect. I asked a friend once, "Why can't I get along with my family? I get along with all my friends, we never fight or even argue?" She said because I get to choose my friends. I hope this post is not going to scare some of you away or change your opinions of me. Life, relationships, they're hard. I love my dad, don't get me wrong. There's just not much there, no substance, I guess. (in the relationship) Does that make sense?


I am blessed that my children have the kind of father I craved. They have the kind of father that takes each one out for "daddy time" on a "daddy date". They run to him every night when he comes home. He plays tag with them and "Lava Monster" at the park. He reads with them before bed and plays video games with them. (of course) We can't wait to see him and Jedi tomorrow afternoon when they come home from the big Cub Scout camping trip!


I hope everyone's Father's day is a happy one with wonderful memories and fun times!
God bless!

11 comments:

  1. Jamie, you didn't say too much. You said just enough. You said what is in your heart. God bless you!

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  2. Happy Father's Day to your husband. God blesses us in many different ways and you have a gem under your own roof. God bless!

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  3. I was just thinking that your father/parents are just one way that the Lord is honoring your request - the title of your blog - "Lord, make me a saint."

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  4. My dad died when I was 11 years old. I'm so thankful that I had such a wonderful father, if only for such a short time. I'm sorry that you don't have that, but I'm so glad that your children do! Tell Tom Happy Father's Day!

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  5. What a wonderful post!!! Happy Father's Day to your DH!

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  6. I really get this post Jamie and I am glad you write from the heart. Sometimes it seems like I am the only one on this planet to have a screwed up relationship with my parents.

    We are so lucky and blessed to have the guys in our life that we do.

    Happy Father's Day to one good Daddy---Tom!

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  7. Hope the camping trip was great! You are truly blessed to have a husband who takes time out to do things with your kids - without constant prodding or guilt tripping to get him to do so!
    I always wished my dad would have spent ANY amount of time with us, but knew that would never fit into his schedule. Ever.
    Always hoped my hubby would be the opposite. It's hit and miss with that, and way more miss than hit.

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  8. After reading this I so wish I could give you a hug.

    Thank you Jamie for being so real and I agree with Carrie that Our Lord will sanctify you through these struggles. In His generousity He has blessed you with a wonderful father to your children.

    Remeber when Jesus said that if we (heavy paraphrasing here) just loved those who were easy to love...anyone could do that...it didn't take a saint to do that...??

    God your father loves you....perfectly. May you always feel His nearness.

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  9. Jamie, my heart goes out to you, for I truly understand. When I was reading your post, the image in my mind that came to me was God the Father loving you so much. You don't have to try to impress Him. He loves you and wants a deep relationship with you just as you are! I also liked what Carrie said about the Lord using your difficult relationships to grow you in holiness (help you become a saint). And what a blessing that you have the example of your husband's relationship with your kids! That you can witness and experience first-hand such an awesome relationship must give you great comfort and joy. God bless you, Jamie! I hope it was a wonderful Father's Day for your hubby.

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  10. I love the colors of your blog...It is very eye catching.

    Enjoyed reading your blog tonight.....I love finding new blogs...Had a little time to blog hop tonight while waiting to go to the hospital and welcome a new grandson tomorrow. This month I am posting about our Disney trip, plus a great giveaway.

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  11. Jamie, thanks for the book recommendations! I ordered some books hoping and praying they can make our marriage even better!

    By the way, have you ever heard of "Mary Undoer Of Knots"? I just finished the novena to her. Now I'm starting a new 54 day rosary novena.

    You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

    May God Bless you and your family.

    Love,
    Maria

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Thank you so much for stopping and commenting!

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