Tomorrow I go in for my 20 week ultrasound. It's a level 2, which means it is with a Perinatologist,
who will count every heart valve and count every toe and finger, measure the amount of space between the baby's mouth and nose, and just about everything that can be measured, including amniotic fluid, where the placenta is located (hopefully not attached to my scar tissue, after 5 C-sections) and then
make recommendations to my OB as to when and how often my non-stress tests should start, and when and how many ultrasounds should also be scheduled. Within a couple weeks, I will have about 40 appointments
scheduled leading up to the C-section itself, which will probably be on January 5th.
Being a Type I Diabetic, I should be used to this, right? Well...I'm so nervous. I could cry but I don't have time to cry. We are not finding out the sex of the baby this time, so I am feeling even more nervous, just to find out if the baby is safe. So far, every time I go in to the doctor (I go 2x/month now) the doctor says I have a very active baby, just yesterday, the heart rate was down to 154....could be a boy! Could be a girl!!
I'm trying not to panic about all the appointments and trying to fit them all in with trying to homeschool 4 kiddos. I will be at the clinic for 3, and sometimes 4 appointments per week, starting in about a month or so, til the end. I'm happy to do what I need to do to have a healthy baby, I am just feeling a little overwhelmed.
Praying for peace of heart. Trying to take it all in stride. I've done this before. This should be easy, right?
I always worry about this little sweet baby in my womb from the moment I find out I'm pregnant til I deliver and have that baby home. Then, it's a different kind of worry. Having a little brother that was born with heart defects and had major surgeries and then died after only being home a week, I just know how hard that is and worry each time something like that will happen to me too. I know all these fears and worries come from the devil himself. He wants me to have that unrest. He wants me to have no peace.
Praying for peace of heart.
Will you pray for me too?
Thank you so very much!