Prayer life struggles.
They really go hand in hand.
The two are so similar in so many ways.
I get frustrated with myself, when I don't make my goals,
or I don't do as much as I should.
Do you think God gets frustrated with us?
He expects us to pray.
He expects us to do our best and give our best for Him.
How often do we measure up?
A perfect start to a day would go something like this:
(after a full night's sleep with no interruptions)
6am: morning prayers and breakfast
7am: 1 hour long workout
8am: Shower and get ready for the day
8:30-9am: The kiddos wake up!
What actually happens is something like this:
2:30-3:30am: One child wakes up coughing so hard that she pukes in a bucket and the sink,
You calm her, give her Vicks on her chest, give her some warm tea (after going downstairs to get it prepared) rub her back and feet til she goes to sleep.
4am: Another child sneaks into bed with you because her sister keeps kicking her and pushing her over in their bed. She snuggles up, wraps her legs around you and plays with your hair.
5:30: Baby wakes up crying and screaming, you don't want the whole house to wake up this early, so you take her into bed with you and she finally falls asleep around 6:30, but you do too.
8:30: You wake up, finally, wanting so badly to workout, but everyone is awake and wondering when mama is going to get up. Mama puts workout clothes on anyway, hoping for an opportunity in the day sometime to workout.
4pm: You get your opportunity, but only have 1/2 hour to workout and so you take it, shower and then it's time to make supper.
But you feel failure because you had your workout clothes on all day and did nothing. You didn't go outside, because those workout clothes were on, You didn't run any errands, you didn't get a head start on laundry or anything. You didn't even have (make) time to say your morning prayers.
This has been my life the past 4 weeks.
Pretty much since getting back from Mexico.
It's funny, from December 28 until March 24 I exercised 6 days a week,
every morning except Sundays, at 6am.
(There were 2 days in there where I exercised later in the day)
That's almost 90 days!
I had drive, energy and couldn't miss a day.
I woke up energized and ready between 5:30 and 6am.
Then Mexico happened.
I got up early, but didn't exercise.
I didn't gain any weight.
I came home and actually lost another couple pounds making my total weight loss
Now, I'm back to 11 pounds lost.
Yes, that means gain.
Loss and gain,
I can't keep track.
I've still been exercising, just struggling to do so
barely 4 days per week.
Why is this such a struggle?
My prayer life struggles too.
Every day I give thanks
I offer up my day.
I long for quiet time alone with God.
I long for exercise time alone.
I want that energy and drive I had before.
Why do I struggle to get up early?
I have time to see my husband before he goes to work
(I love that, I miss him in the mornings)
I have time to pray
I have time to exercise
I don't have these inner struggles
I feel great!
Why is it so hard to do it?
Am I alone here?
Does anyone out there have any of the same struggles?
I pray for order and timeliness
for the ambition I need to be all God wants me to be.
I pray for you too.