Monday, April 22, 2013

I'm Stuck Every Day

Feeling defeated.
I've been trying to go to daily 7am Mass,
  (except on snowy days and sick kid days)
which means I have to get up at 5 to workout
 to be done by 6 to shower 
and be ready for Mass.

I just have no energy
I've given up Diet Coke

For the first time in my life,
I have no ambition.

I even take "Before" pictures like this, hoping to motivate 
Here's my problem areas
Although, I am told by my doctor that my stomach will not go away
unless it is surgically removed.

I've never experienced a "no ambition" time in my life

Is it age?


  1. Persevere! But also maybe change your workout time. I'm not an early morning exercise person, I'm too stiff and crabby. Also it takes a long time to see results and it can feel like it's not worth it, but no matter how much we weigh, exercise is making us healthier. Focus on health :-) everyday is a new day full of opportunities to be healthier and glorify the body God gave you.

    1. We discussed vitamins between emails...might need to try iron...

      Just for everyone else's info, with my type 1 diabetes, if I workout in the evenings, I tend to drop really low blood sugars during the night--kind of dangerous.

  2. Don't get down on yourself. Keep on truck'in and focus on healthy choices. Take it one step at a time. It always helps me to write down my goals and to persevere. Pray, hope and don't worry. All that snow that you have been getting is probably not helping motivate anyone.

    1. Yes, keep on truckin'! It's snowing as I type this...another 5-6 inches I hear! It is a little discouraging, as far as outside walking!

  3. Jamie know what I see when I look at that picture? I see a beautiful, smiling, happy, wife, mother, and friend. I see a woman who has nurtured and given birth to sweet, beautiful babies. I see a woman who obviously puts God and her family before herself. I see a woman who inspires me to be a better Catholic, a better wife and mommy, and even a better blogger. Just sayin'... : )

    1. My first thought is, "Oh, whatever!"

      But thank you Billie Jo, I know all that, but it doesn't make it easier...

  4. I bet it's the timing. Or that time!
    I used to be sooo upset about not getting to daily Mass or a bible study or anything else at Church. A priest reminded me "Motherhood id not a sprint. It's a marathon. God has called you to be with your children now and we'll still be here when you are at a less hectic time."
    It helped some. Walking helped a lot. Start with a mile. Every day. It'll make you feel like a million bucks.
    Don't you have a quote from St. Francis of Rome at your other blog:)
    You're great, don't despair.

    1. I'm finally able to go to daily Mass, so I'm torn, between going to Mass or working out, and I pick Jesus first. I've been hoping HE will take care of the rest. Put that motivation in me. Hasn't happened yet!

      I teared up when I went and read that quote at Catholic Cuisine--that is a great quote!

      Will there ever be a less hectic time?

  5. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. I started on Lent, a little late because I had an appendectomy on Fat Tuesday. I was doing 40 miles in 40 days. It does help that I have an elliptical in the basement. Every afternoon I would exercise 30 minutes. It was slow at the beginning. But then I was able to do 3 miles in 30 minutes and then I decided to do 4 miles and before Easter I had 100 miles. Then I decided to do 1000 miles by the end of the year. I am at 5 miles a day in 45 minutes. But I started with barely 2 miles and sore scars.
    I can't do daily Mass yet. We do first Friday. This summer I hope to do every Friday. What is God asking you to do? For me sacrificing food and taking time to exercise brings me closer to God. Mass does that too but I figure once these kiddos get a little older we will be there more often. As much as I admire the woman with ten kids who goes to daily Mass to receive those graces, God knows I can't do that yet. One day I'll be that little old lady there every day but until then I just say a prayer when I want to eat or when I have one more mile to go.

    1. OH, Towers!! Yay for you--super job on working up to a great workout! I know it will happen. I'm at up to 3x per week, but that is not enough to lose--it has to be 6 x per week. So I'm stuck.

      I just want to cry when I think of giving up Mass. My husband is staying later in the mornings so I can go--I'm home by 7:45, so this is without the kids...for some alone time. I YEARN for Jeuss. So it just makes me so sad to give it up. And the lady who goes with 10 kids, well, something else MUST be lacking in her life, right?

      Someday, someday....
      Thanks for your kind words.

    2. Mass alone! I envy you! :) I can see why the idea is so heart breaking. Don't give that up! As moms we get so little time alone with our Lord. My husband leaves at 6:00 am or earlier. So, even though they are in the other room, sometimes fight, my afternoon exercise is my alone time.

  6. I don't think you see what we see. You are truly beautiful, my friend, inside and out, and your body is so much better off than mine was when i first started.

    I, too, would suggest the iron. As one who struggles with anemia, I know how much is zaps you when you are low on iron.

    Just do little things at first- park farther away, aim for more steps inside your house, practice lifting with Sims or even some of the girls.

    You can do this, but think of yourself how God sees you: beautiful, made in His image, and someone He so loves.

    1. I'm going to look for Iron supplements today. I don't eat that much meat or spinach...I eat lettuce. (no nutritional value there!) I do the park far away--have you seen our van? It's a monster and I'm not good at parking it, so I park really far away, still people park close to me and we can't get our doors open!! :)

      I know it will happen. It's the energy thing right now.

      thanks so much for your kind words, Shelly, you are always so kind and thoughtful.

  7. So many things came to mind when I read this post earlier, Jamie Jo, and you have so many online supporters that what else can I say? I am right there with you - where do you fit it in, how do you get motivated, I have no energy to do everything else so how in the world can I do this? (yes, even walk for a silly 10 minutes), yada, yada, yada. I have no suggestions.

    Mass is certainly important. All I can say is that I started stressing about this, and wanting to go and then feeling guilty when I didn't. Until one day, I was like, maybe it's not my season to go to daily Mass, and that's OK. You know? I only went to be with the Lord. I can't take communion since it's the host only during the week. Lately I have considered combining prayer / reflection with exercising. I am considering joining a YMCA (25 minutes away) and going three times a week since the kids can be watched. I find having appointments work best and keep me to task but who do I make the appointment with?

    Anyway, rambling to say you're not alone in this struggle, and that you can do it. Each day is a new day.

    1. Gosh, I have a man that I know, came up to us 2 years ago, when we were trying to go to daily noon Mass, all 5 kiddos at the time, he told me the same thing, maybe it was not my "season" yet. He could see my littles were not being that good and I was drenched in sweat trying to keep them by me...and that's only a half hour Mass!!

      I know. I just yearn for Jesus, and you know the more we go, the more we want to go. I cry at the thought of giving it up. I might have to.

      Thanks for your kind words, it's nice to know others struggle with the same thing.

  8. Why has nobody commented on the fact that your daughter is holding a sword??? :-)

    Hey, I'm exactly where you're at. I really struggle with finding time and energy to exercise...and I really do enjoy exercising once I get started. I feel huge amounts of guilt when I put myself ahead of the 7 little ones. And, my baby is about the same age as yours. So, I'm struggling with the same how to lose the baby pounds. I'll have a good couple weeks and then fall off the bandwagon - hard - and I'm back where I started...ugh!

    I do have to add, that in the land of perpetual winter, the huge lack of sunshine and abundance of gloom and snow has zapped the life out of most of us. I'm hopeful that when spring finally arrives, it will help us all tremendously. I see a forecast of 70 degrees and sun for you think it could really happen?

    And the daily Mass - I go back and forth with guilt about this too. For now, we try to make it 2 or 3 Fridays a month. We do daily readings and rosary at home where the littles can run and cause as much chaos as they want.

    Sorry that this got so long...God Bless!

    1. The sword, the sword....I'm emailing you!!

  9. Ok Jamie,
    You know how I don't ever comment...but you really, REALLY are beautiful! Please watch this video, twice if you need to.

    Because, you.are.beautiful

    Love, Karla Wild

    1. Karla, my good friend. You made me burst out and cry. Thank you. Love you.

  10. Wow, getting up at 5 a.m. to work out, then going to mass every day at 7 a.m. sounds like you actually have a lot of ambition. You are probably exhausted. Been there, done that...still doing that many days. Take care of yourself. Be kind. Be patient. God isn't finished with any of us yet. You sure do inspire me! Hugs from Arizona.

    1. I said, if I were to work out, it would have to be at that time...not that I've done it yet. Just Mass by 7--so I'm getting up at 6, after snoozing for an hour and giving up the 5 am thing!! haha!

      Thanks so much Debbie!

  11. It sounds like depression to me. Not depression as in: Run, get on anti-depressant, quick! (They have their place, but lots is solvable in other ways.) But depression as in: take your iron, TAKE VIT. D3 (you have to be really low!), eat plenty of protein and healthy fats, no wheat or sugar.

    It is depressing enough to have endless winter, feel like you're failing at exercising, and not liking what you see in the mirror without making it too hard on yourself. I've started doing much shorter, intense workouts. 10-20 minutes of bodyweight stuff. It makes me tired, sore, and I get all the good feelings without an hour of cardio! I can slip it in at any time during the day and the kids can do it with me.

    Also, I was a big fan of TLC's What Not to Wear until we lost that cable channel. It's all about dressing in a flattering way that makes you feel good. I think you're beautiful, just like everyone else said, but the large tees don't flatter any of us! I spent years wearing XL loose clothing, and I feel better about myself now that I dress better, even though I never lost the weight and now weigh 40 lbs. MORE! (shocking to write that!) I almost never wear things like that now, except when camping. All my tees are vnecks and fitted. And colorful.

    Finally, I wish I knew where it was, but someone was commenting on the Dove video and linked to another blog post where the writer showed a pictured of her and her family. She asked everyone what they saw/thought when they looked at the picture, and none of them replied that they were looking at how fat she is! They all had good things to say about the photo, just like everyone sees your beauty, inside and out, and no one is looking at your problem areas!

    Hug yourself and say nice things to yourself. From one who knows: it makes a difference. <3

    1. Oh, Sara--I know. I am on the verge of tears it seems a lot. I am taking D vitamins...I eat very healthy, I actually do really good on my diet, perfect, til supper, when I forget to count and those couple hundred calories can really keep us right where we are. I'm not gaining, I'm stuck. At least I know my problem time.

      I'm trying to be patient and be OK with only 20-30 minutes, up to 3x per week, but let's face it, if we want to LOSE weight, it has to be at least 6 days a week!!

      Oh, gosh, the big tees. It's my wardrobe. I have every color except yellow and orange!! I levitate towards big tees...cover up my HUGE 6 C-section tummy. I've tried the more fitted tops, (a couple times) but just don't feel comfortable--have you seen my boobs? They are HUGE.

      Thanks so much for your kind words. Nice to know I'm not alone.

  12. Jamie Jo, I hate to see you so discouraged. The weather there has got to play a huge part in this. Also, how many hours of sleep are you getting? Some people need 6 hours, others need 9 to fully function. I know for me, drinking a lot of water made me less tired during the day....can't say I exercise, but I still felt a lot better. Hang in and good luck!

    1. Kathleen, thank you. I'm working on that sleep thing. Simeon is finally sleeping through the night (within the last couple weeks) it seems the more sleep I get, the more tired I am. Why is that? If I get 7-8 hours, I'm spent for the day. I think 6 is my good. Anything less and it feels as if I were out drinking til 2am. (not that I know that feeling:)

      I do drink a lot of water (ask anyone who knows me, I've always drank lots...It's the reason for my clear skin--just kidding. I HAVE had a hard time since I quit pumping to get all my water I don't crave it anymore. See? AGE, I'm going right from pumping breastmilk into menopause!

    2. Being tired after a decent nights sleep means that your body is saying you need more of the same! Feeling energized after what is not enough sleep means you are running on adrenaline, and that will wear out your adrenals if it hasn't already. You need a good, long rest, and probably a break from exercise other than walking, while your body recovers from the ultra-pumping-marathon!

  13. First, there are so many great comments on here and I hope they help. I do have to agree though with them all and point out your natural beauty and the amazing woman you are. Seriously, Jamie.I cannot mention how often I think of you and your natural beauty/perfection. When I'm having a crappy day (mostly due to my outward appearance and numerous flaws) I wonder how you manage to look so radiant all the time. I'm not even kidding. You come to mind so often. I'll admit, it may be out of jealousy ;)

    Second, I think this particular winter and now spring is kicking us all in the butt. We are all stuck, feeling awful and there is no end in sight. Rest assured you are not alone. I am dragging....a lot right now.

    Lastly, I wish I had some pointers to give or suggestions, but I've only found what works for me through a lot of trial and error. I used to love 5 or 6 am workouts, now I get up at 5:30 just to stay ahead of my early risers. I've aged like a million years in the last two years (seriously). I am at the point now that if I do not exercise on a particular day, I feel it. Not always physically, but mentally I feel edgy and grumpy. I also do a lot more negative self talk if I haven't made the point to exercise and just BE healthy that day. After both girls I started with at least 3-4 days/week and most often it was walking outside or treadmill or doing the Leslie DVD's. Then I started implementing a little bit of running. I gradually tried to exercise more like 4-5 days a week and now 5-6 because I feel more 'athletic' or healthy. I still can only muster 30-40 mins. I just can't find the time to do more right now. Sometimes I do evenings, but feel guilty doing it during family time. I usually do during the day when school is done and at least one girl is napping (usually Margaret because Gianna is more content playing on her own). I also enlist the help of the big kids a lot of the time and while they may grumble about watching the girls, sometimes I remind them that I'm doing this to stay healthy so I can be here with them.

    Ok, I've gone on too long. I hope it was helpful and not frustrating reading. I hope you find what works for you and you can feel successful with whatever schedule you need to make work. Keep us posted! {hugs} and much love!

    1. Oh, Sarah--you are so nice to me. I can't imagine anyone being jealous of me. Seriously. You have no flaws!!

      You run. I'm jealous of that. Cannot imagine running with these, ummm, big boobs. I'd have to wear like 3 bras and hold my chest as I ran.

      Winter, yes winter....It is discouraging. I thought we'd be walking to the park by now.

      I know in order to LOSE weight, I need to workout at least 6 days/week, but am only at barely 3x. (that's a good week) I thought once I started, I'd feel so good, it would be easy to do it every day. I remember after Bridget--working out every morning and if she woke up, I had the attitude, that "you kids made me fat, you can watch the baby" SO I do have them watch the littles. haha!

      Thanks so much. Can't wait to get together this summer...gosh that sounds so warm and nice, doesn't it? This summer, this summer....

  14. Thank you all. I didn't post to "get compliments" I post, I blog, to get things out. To write about what's on my mind and in my heart. I love all of you. I appreciate all your kind words.

  15. Okay. My first thought, you are biting off more than you can chew. Haven't read any of the other comments above, I may repeat. But what about baby steps? The no diet soda any more is HUGE!! You are a very busy mama with one still in recovery mode (I'm assuming) and daily Mass, though awesome it is, can be a lot for one person who has a lot of irons in the fire right now. Not wanting to discourage attendance at daily mass, just wanting to shed light on which chapter of life you are in and what is actually possible. What about attending one extra day for starters, gradually working up? What about getting up and popping in a stretching dvd (I have one for 10 min's) and then gradually work up to more extensive? Just my thoughts...and know you are NOT alone in your tiredness. You are NOT lazy. Sometimes mamas need that extra motivation. Life can be pretty depressing as a home school mom. I know. Hang in there and preserver. Just reassess and then move forward. YOU CAN DO IT!

  16. prayers for you (myself and all mama's with a new baby) during this time of exhaustion and uncertainty.
    may you continue to turn to the Living God who gives grace sufficient.
    may you die to self and seek only His will.
    may you be content and find joy in the present.
    may you grow in love for yourself as He desires.
    lastly, may you ditch any all-or-nothing tendencies.

    ad Jesum per Mariam, lena

  17. Baby steps. Seriously.

    If you can exercise 5 minutes today and 6 minutes tomorrow, you have improved. If you do 5 body-weight squats today and do 6 in two days, you have improved.

    I'm lazy. I hate to exercise. I've really tried to squeeze something in when I'm standing there. If I'm putting away groceries, I try to do a milk jug arm curl for 10 times, before I put the milk away. Grab the 2nd gallon and do it with the other arm. Standing by the stove, I'm doing toe raises (really bad ankles). Doing dishes I try and do some body weight squats.

    Small steps.

    Plus, if you've given up Diet Coke, are you drinking enough water? If I don't have the water bottle next to my chair, I forget to drink it and then I'm tuckered.

    I think you look great. You aren't seeing the great Mom and Catholic that we are seeing.

    God Bless and think happy thoughts.

    p.s. Ask you doctor about Vit D3 - if you are low, then you probably need some more, even though it might seem like you are taking a lot. If I get down, then I might have to take 6000 IU/day, when Dr. tells me to.

  18. eeeeeeek! No diet pop???!!! THAT is why you are so crabby! Just kidding.

    I need to give that up also. However, I am slurping on my second pop right now and so love it.

    eeeeeeeek! 5am workout!! THAT is why you are so crabby! no kidding. that is so early but if you can do it...kuddos..big big kuddos.

    eeeeeeek! give up morning Mass? Not too sure that is a good idea. I know how much you love Jesus. I think it would make you more crabby not to get that precious precious time in.

    I sound dramatic.

    I personally think you are a very very beautiful woman..those blue eyes and black hair are gorgeous and come had 6 babies and are so busy. It is that perfectionist brain of yours driving you crazy.

    Look how much support you have and how many people love you.

    I think it is the stupid snow. Makes me crabby. I am an outside person and I dont want to be outside in this snow!

    hugs and love you friend.

    1. eeeeeeeeeK! Did I say I was crabby? Speak for yourself!! haha!

      Thanks friend.

  19. Don't be so hard on yourself. You have 6 beautiful, happy children and a tough year behind you. All you can do is take one day at a time. Stick to Weight Watchers, and exercise. Prayer helps too. You love fabulous just the way you are! Keep your chin up and God bless!

  20. When I first read this from my phone there were no comments- my first thought was that you area beautiful mom!! Amazingly so. My second thought was that you are in a tough season (that will end some day) so be kind to yourself.

    For encouragement, I would highly recommend "Made to Crave". It is a book that has been a life changer for me. It deals primarily with motivation rather than the actual eating plan.

  21. I agree with focusing on your prayer life and your relationship with God, and if after prayer and if possible adoration, you still feel the same, seek a good doctor who may be able to help. I've had times where I felt similar and prayer and adoration helped me tremendously. You are a very beautiful person and I love your inspirational posts. God will guide you through these tough times. I will be praying for you as well!

  22. I just saw this post...I know how you feel. Six csection is no fun for your mid section (says the recently mom of six csetions). Even when I was running 30 miles a was my HARDEST area. I remember a running photo of me crossing the finish line (and the "baby" was 2!) and my belly was than I thought.

    I'll keep you in my prayers. I am 7 weeks post partum as of tomorrow, and I'm itching to get started on working out (nothing but walking until next week, per doctors order..BOO). But I gained the most this time. I have 40 pregnancy pounds to lose, but a total of 60 to get to my healthy weight on my small frame. Hang in there. You have to find something you like. Really. If you don't love your workouts, you won't do them. Running is my passion, so I can't wait to sweat and get that runners high.

  23. Oh, and what I had to do, after so many kids, was get a gym membership. When money was tighter (it's tight now, but tighter when the kids were younger), my husband worked a few extra hours to make the money to pay for it. We have a family membership, and after my fifth baby and became a Secular Carmelite, I had to put my prayer time first, then my workouts. Because, like you, I tried the early am working out and I couldn't do it. Plus, the child care at the club doesn't open until 830am, and my husband leaves for work at 430am, so I couldn't even hit the gym before he went to work because they open at 530am. Anyway, I ended up working out in the evening. We had dinner before, or after. Usually after. I did my runs anywhere around 430-530, then I also did some Zumba classes in the evening. I brought the kids because they have an area for little ones, then a big area for the older ones. As a home schooling family, it's a big help for momma to get her time and for kids to get out of the house. Elizabeth Foss posted a great post about it, and how it was helpful for her son. I've noticed my 12 year old struggling with depression since she started her period. She and I are doing the couch potato to 5K program this summer together.


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