Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Pregnancy

I'm fat
I've gained way too much weight already (like 28 lbs and have a little over 3 months left)
My back hurts
I can't sleep
I have absolutely no energy, even to walk across the room, seems too much.
The stairs are breathtaking now.  (as in, they make me breathless to climb them)
My lap is disappearing
I have no winter prego clothes that fit me, last time I was pregnant in the winter, I was 60 lbs less
No nesting happening here, I'm too tired
I leak
Anyone else ever leak when pregnant?
Not just when I laugh, it just happens, I leak when I'm pregnant.
I gotta wear those little liners every day
I'm getting too big for, um, let's call it "nighttime romance"
I have around 30 appointments scheduled for the next 3 months and that's just for me,
that doesn't count dentist, eye doctor and doctor appts for the kiddos that I need to make
I'm tired of having low blood sugar all the time
I'm tired of the 8-10 testings I need to do every day and 5+ shots and adjusting my rising insulin every week
I'm trying so very hard to not worry about the future surgeries this baby is going to need
I'm trying to not worry about whether I will be able to nurse or not, no matter what, this baby will get mama's milk
Funny how this 9 months is the longest, hardest of all, yet, the first 9 months of that baby's life, will fly by!
Baby
Baby
Keep your eyes on the prize
It's that baby that keeps me going,
it's that baby that makes it all worth it.
It's that baby that makes us all forget all the pains of pregnancy.
This sweet, little, innocent soul, and his/her angel are with me all the time
and that makes me happy.
so very happy.
With every kick and pain, I'm reminded of something bigger than me
So very blessed and honored to accept God's glorious gift
So blessed indeed
So very blessed.

The good far outweighs the bad!!!  
The good is what keeps us going, isn't it?
I'm doing great everyone, really, I am!

20 comments:

  1. I'm with you! If it helps, I've gained too much too. My doc and I just shrug our shoulders. Seriously, what can you do? I'm on the go nearly all day and while my diet isn't the best I'm not overeating (I have a day or two) and some days I only have a bit. I gained 11 lbs one month and I was coming off the first trimester barely eating phase!

    Keep that baby in mind! Count every little kick as a blessing. When I'm out of breath and feeling the heartburn, I say a prayer of thanks because I'd rather have the baby high than low (ouch!). Rest when you can (haha, right?), pray, and remember pregnancy isn't forever. :) Still saying prayers for you.

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  2. I will offer up my recent miscarriage for you. I would glady trade with you right now. You're right, keep your eyes on the prize.

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  3. Oh, Tina Marie, I'm so sorry. I'll pray for you. I'm so very humbled by your prayers and sacrifices.

    Really, everyone, I'm doing fine, it's just, you know, pregnancy woes, and like I said, the good FAR outweighs the bad. It's so worth it in the end.

    THANK YOU everyone, I really appreciate all your prayers.

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  4. Praying, Jamie. But you already know that. :) xoxo

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  5. see! I told you my woes were a tiny speck in the grand scheme of things! That baby is so blessed to be joining your family!

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  6. I get the leaking too! :-) Not fun!

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  7. I am praying for you daily! The blessings are always going to mulitply as the baby gets older, too. No oyster created a pearl without some distress and irritation. Hang in there!

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  8. Jamie- Oh, you have brought back many memories of hard days and pregnancy sacrifices and the experience of waiting those looooong 9 months! Just the mention of the word "leak" makes me wonder if I could ever face another pregnancy! ;) But, then I think about the beauty of looking into the face of a brand new baby and holding him/her for the first time and introducing him/her to the siblings etc... And I know when you post pics of your baby I will be SO jealous! Hang in there, and know there are prayers heading your way.

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  9. Some of your list made me laugh...some made me grateful that it isn't me (perhaps YET) going thru some of those things...and too many I could most certainly understand.

    Just hitting 20 wks. here tomorrow and feeling overwhelemed by the labs that found that my thyroid needs change in meds. and my progesterone dropped so I need to change that dosage too. And then I read abotu your pokes, jabs, testings and appointments and found that I should just be thankful. And also send you a few extra prayers today.

    Knowing that you and baby are always held close!

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  10. Thanks for keepin' it real. I will reread this post when I get baby fever for #6 :)

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  11. Hang in there love. With Sonja, I was in a hospital bed for a month, and didn't see my kids, AT ALL, for six weeks. I was discharged as the blizzard of 2010 was coming down. I remember how hard that was, and I didn't have the diabetes (a good friend of mine is dealing with that now). Before you know it, this baby will be a toddler and it will all be a distant memory! Love you! And I was so big this last time. I remember sitting on the edge of my hospital bed, waiting to be taken downstairs to radiology for a sonogram...my OB walks in, looks up from her chart, and says, "Wow...you are just huge!" Argh!

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  12. Shelly, love the oyster comparison!!

    Thanks you all!! Some of your comments made me laugh!

    SO glad some of you all leak too.

    Gosh, Jen, I was on bedrest with my first, and had to miss my daycare kiddos, (28 days, but who's counting?) and that was terrible, I couldn't imagine missing my own children for that long. Wow. You are amazing.

    I also have to say, I do not have gestational Diabetes, I have Type 1, so it's not as hard, because I know what I'm doing. It becomes 2nd nature, it's just that, that doesn't mean I like it. AND it is a lot more work than when I'm not pregnant, but again, so worth it.

    Thanks again all of you!!

    Colleen, Don't re-read this, we are MEANT to forget it all!!

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  13. You are more than halfway done! You can do it! It's ok to feel crummy! You can do it!!! :0)

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  14. Hang in there; it's hard!

    I smiled bigger every time I read a new statement. It's not because I am taking joy on your sufferings, but because I know exactly what you're describing, remember exactly how it feels (except dealing with diabetes), and sympathize completely. I'm not pregnant right now, but the memories don't fade, in spite of what people say.

    It is so hard to bring a new little soul into the world! It is hard physically, it is hard mentally, it is hard spiritually.

    Starting at 18 weeks, my pelvis/hips hurt so sharply and so badly that I cannot move my legs apart without pain. This is difficult to describe, but it's a motion that is necessary for sitting, standing, laying down, and walking. It is positively agonizing! The crazy thing is that it's because my pelvis is allowing the joints and bones to spread in anticipation of birth ... a birth that I won't have. Can't I just tell my stupid pelvis that it doesn't have to actually push a baby out (cesarean)?

    And yes ... I leak when pregnant. Fortunately, it only happens in late pregnancy--6 months on--and only when I laugh or cough or sneeze. But still. I've never had a vag birth and I hear that's what weakens the pelvic floor and allows that wonderful little leak. Baloney! It's humiliating. I feel for you.

    You've got your eyes on the prize, and that's the way to go!

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  15. Hi Jamie, I have been following your blog for two years now. You are an ispiration to me. I want to let you know that you are an amazing person. You are a giver of life. God has blessed you with this adorable children. Before I end my comment, I will like to let you know that I have a Tupperwave Giveaway Contest on my Blog. If you can share this with your readers. Thank you.

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  16. How come nobody farts? I was a huge farter when I was pregnant with my little avabean. Right in Target walking with my teen-age son....HONK!

    I ran down the isle and laughed so hard I probably leaked too.

    My farts woke me up at night...I was so embarrassed because Brian I am sure was so grossed out.

    I then quickly moved to sleeping to the chair downstairs because of this horrible nerve pain I had going down my leg.

    I am sure there was more....but time does go by and I am so excited to see this baby and hold and smell this baby. There is NOTHING like a baby.

    I already look back at some of Ava's pictures and it is like a blur. One big blur that she was ever little.

    Hang in there. It IS all worth it.

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  17. Did I miss something Jamie? Future surgeries for your baby? Prayers for you and your family!

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  18. I was just telling my husband... I wish I could have lots more babies without going through pregnancy. I love labor and delivery and of course I LOVE the end result, but 9 months is just SO. LONG. I hope I get to do it several more times though ;)

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